Are we too busy to be compassionate?

Hi everyone,

I recall a study on altruism that I read awhile ago.  It involved a bunch of seminary students.  They were divided into two groups and both were given instructions to go to another location.  One group was told they were late and needed to rush, the other group was not told that.  A person in distress was planted in their path as part of the experiment.  Can you guess which group was more apt to help the person in need? It wasn’t those who thought they were running late… (see “The Good Samaritan Study”).

I am concerned about many of the recent trends in our society, especially, the short and long term consequences of the gadget-ridden, multi-tasking, over-scheduled pace that has become the new norm.  We are all in a hurry, all of the time, and it is accepted like that is just the way it is.

What price do we pay in lost ability to respond compassionately when someone is genuinely in need of help? And what are we losing in self-awareness, close relationships, and the ability to think novel, creative thoughts?

The psychotherapist in me suspects there are deeper issues going on.  In our quest to evade the distress within, we stay distracted.  Yet the cumulative stress of chronic busy-ness in and of itself can create the same states in our bodies as actual traumatic experiences, thereby increasing distress.  It is a no-win cycle.

Our good friend Tarra Stariell will be in Orange County on Saturday, February 26 to present No time to think, No time to breathe… Is this me? Tarra is a psychotherapist in private practise with over 16 years of experience.  She specializes in working with trauma, auto-immune and dissociative disorders and we are delighted to have her present on this timely topic.  This workshop is a service to the community and no one will be turned away for lack of funds.  Please see our website for all details.

Warmly,

Barbara English
Living Ubuntu
livingubuntu.org | blog | facebook

PS:  I hope to see you tomorrow (Saturday, Feb 12th) evening at the screening of On Our Watch, a powerful documentary about the ongoing genocide in Darfur.

PPS:  The irony of marketing two events in one post is not lost on me. :)

No time to think, No time to breathe…
Is this me?

by
Tarra Stariell

 No time to think, No time to breathe... Is this me?

presented by

Living Ubuntu
Southern California Institute for Bioenergetic Analysis

Saturday, February 26 2011
9:30a – 1:00p

Orange County, CA

Why is it so hard to keep up?  Where is the time for me?  Why do I feel so lost in my own life?

Join us for a workshop about our overwhelmed lives and how to find our way back to a healthy balance.
This is a not-for-profit event.  No one will be turned away for lack of funds.

Advance registration is required. Please visit http://livingubuntu.org/events for more information.

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Why is saying “I can’t” so difficult?

“Unfortunately, most people do not stop to feel their tiredness. Faced with the pressures of life, they believe that it is a matter of survival to go on as they have been. Feeling tired raises a deep fear that they may not be able to continue the struggle. Many find it difficult to say, ‘I can’t.’ As children, they were taught that where there’s a will, there’s a way. To say, ‘I can’t,’ is to admit failure, which is seen as evidence that they are unworthy of love.”

– Alexander Lowen

Hi everyone,

No time to think, No time to Breathe... Is this Me? (Saturday,  June 5th)

We still have space available for No time to think, No time to breathe… Is this me? this coming Saturday, June 5th. I really hope you will join us, and here’s why.

It has become commonplace to joke about our crazy-busy-multi-tasking-non-stop-over-scheduled lives, yet how did we get to this place of taking it so lightly? Are we really willing to collapse into resignation and say, this is just the reality of life in current day society? We accept overwhelm as the new norm?

What is this driven-ness to be super-human, defy all limits, and push beyond our natural reservoir of energy?

We are in trouble when start using our emergency inner resources on a day-to-day basis just to get by. The good news / bad news is we can adapt to ever increasing demands really well, but not without paying the horribly destructive price that we stop feeling what we are really doing to ourselves. Eventually we reach exhaustion . . . of course we might not even notice that. Sometimes we just get numb and stop feeling. Despite the exhaustion we just keep going because we don’t feel much of anything anymore. We fail to recognize the self-cruelty in this, and the result of vicarious traumas we have yet to process.

Our bodies were designed to push and stop, run and rest, exert and recuperate, expand and contract. When we stop abiding by the rhythm of life itself, we lose the ability to know our own inner state, think creatively, and grow in consciousness. We also lose the ability to resonate with one another and the greater world around us. We sacrifice our capacity for that which is ultimately human, to relate, bond, connect, empathize, care and love.

None of us deserves this sort of mistreatment. And we will all pay a hefty price if it persists. We need to push the “pause button” and get re-centered. We all need some help with figuring out how to do this.

I hope you will join us this Saturday. If there is any financial hardship, please do let us know. This workshop series is a service to the community and no one will be turned away for lack of funds.

Barbara Engilsh
Living Ubuntu
livingubuntu.org | blog | facebook

No time to think, No time to breathe…

Is this me?

by

Tarra Stariell

No time to think, No time to breathe... Is this me?

presented by

Living Ubuntu
Southern California Institute for Bioenergetic Analysis

Saturday, June 5 2010
9:00a – 12:00p

University of San Diego
Manchester Conference Center
5998 Alcala Park I
San Diego, CA 92110

Why is it so hard to keep up? Where is the time for me? Why do I feel so lost in my own life?

Join us for a workshop about our overwhelmed lives and how to find our way back to a healthy balance. This is a not-for-profit event. No one will be turned away for lack of funds.

Advance registration is required. Please visit http://livingubuntu.org/events for more information.

* * *